Archive for July, 2010

meow

You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: hi
You: hey
Stranger: asl,
You: meooow
Stranger: wath this
You: this is me meowing
You: meow
Stranger: fuk
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

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Real flame war

You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: What’s up ? 14 m israel :)
You: oh….
You: 16 m palestine…
You: awkward
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

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SOUR. SWEET. GONE.

You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: if i rang your doorbell, what would you do?
Stranger: answer…
You: good
You: and what would you say 2 me
You: when you saww me
Stranger: andwould be like yes?
You: and i would punch you and break ur nose
Stranger: ahh then i would cry
You: then i would say sorry and get you an ice pack
Stranger: then i would say its okay.
You: haha then the commerical for sour patch kids would end.
You: SOUR PATCH KIDS. SOUR. SWEET. GONE
You have disconnected.

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pandas or pasta, that is the question

You: pandas or pasta?
Stranger: pandas????
Stranger: wat is it?
You: PANDA, FURRY MAMMAL FROM CHINA, SPECIES OF BEAR, BLACK AND WHITE, EAT BAAAAMMMBOOO
Stranger: ohhh
Stranger: how can u relate panda with pasta
Stranger: one is animal and other is food
You: how can you NOT
Stranger: one is animal and other is food……………………
You: both are food where im from …..
Stranger: panda is a animal
Stranger: ok
You: do you never eat animals where your from
Stranger: but not panda
Stranger: well i am vegetarian
You: well we eat them here, theyre everywhere, need to control the populations, you know how it gets
Stranger: ok
Stranger: will i will go wiyh pasta
You: good choice, why the fuck would anyone eat a panda
Stranger: u do eat
You: no, whats wrong with you. thats sick eating a panda that is
You: very very sick
Stranger: ohhhhhhhhhh
You: ohhhhhhhh thats all you have to say for yourself, panda eater
Stranger: hey
You: hi
Stranger: dont tell me this
You: tell you what? panda killer
Stranger: hi
Stranger: u r panda eater
Stranger: and killer
You: no, thats twisted mate. thats totally illegal
You: what wrong with you dude
You: where do you get off saying this stuff
Stranger: nowhere
Stranger: u criminal
You: im a law abiding citizen. i dont eat no pandas/whales/tigers. i eat cows, that legal
Stranger: cows is holy here
Stranger: so i dont eat them
You: well i guess thats ok, if theyre holy. here pandas are holy. we worship them 24.7
Stranger: so go and worship them
Stranger: u do it 24*7
You: i worship them by breathing. what else is needed
Stranger: y r u wasting ur time here
You: im not
You: i dont eat pandas, unlike you sir

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Welcome to 2007!

I added a button on the bottom of individual posts that will allow you to post them on your Facebook wall, or send the links directly as messages to other users on Facebook. Share the love!

-JK

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ASL Indeed!

You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: hey
You: Hello
Stranger: asl?
You: Antique sea lions
You: After some lobster
You: Another scooting lion
Stranger: Alka Seltzer Light
You: A Savior Lisp
Stranger: Avery Smokes LSD
You: Amazing Sonic Litter
Stranger: Apple Sauce Lipstick
You: Apes See Leather
Stranger: A Simple Lie
You: Alkaline’s Seemingly Lucid
Stranger: Anthony Scored Lesbians
You: Abraham Sucks Lemons
Stranger: Arrows Struck Larry
You: Afterparties Smell Lovely
Stranger: Able Seniors Lobotomized
You: Amiable Smokers Lift
Stranger: imma go now
Stranger: nice word play
You: Thank you
You: Ok!
You: Bye!
Your conversational partner has disconnected.
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Somebody To Lean On

Stranger: hey
You: Hey :)
You: How are you?
Stranger: umm alright i guess
Stranger: you?
You: I’m good
You: But why only alright?
Stranger: my girlfriend broke up with me
You: Sucks man :(
You: Sorry to hear that
Stranger: yeah
Stranger: its ok
Stranger: its okay if you want to leave
Stranger: i dont want to be a drag
You: Okay cool! Later!

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taking a dump?

You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
You: Well hello there!
Stranger: what’s your deepest darkest secret?
You: I AM CURRENTLY IN THE MIDDLE OF TAKING A DUMP BUT HAVE STOPPED MID-POOP JUST FOR YOU

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