Archive for August, 2010

??????

You: You: hello mark silly i read dark
Stranger: what
Stranger: more like
Stranger: me: wtf?
You: am i right
Stranger: what?
You: dwarfing clock
Stranger: are you a nerd
You: we have wal mart
Stranger: you talking a world of warcraft language ?
Stranger: we got ralphs
You: no we got troubl;e
Stranger: we got tits
You: but i choose if it has a beard
Stranger: ur gay
You: if pork taste like ham
You: and ham taste like pork
Stranger: i dont eat pork
Stranger: so i wouldnt know
You: what the hell does money taste like
Stranger: are you that retarded
Stranger: paper
You: the do reads more than you
Stranger: speak english
Stranger: what
You: ranger: ur gay this is what u say
You: i answer: gay-happy
Stranger: i answer
Stranger: i know your gay
Stranger: i meant gay = homo
You: you know you are young and silly butt gey=homo
Stranger: dude i dont know whats wrong with you, but you got issues
You: you silly hobo
You: force the orange
Connection imploded.

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I might give you 3 wishes though.

You: Hello.
Stranger: hi.
You: How are you?
Stranger: i m fine
Stranger: asl plz
You: asian sexy lamps.
You: you?
Stranger: m/f
You: whats that mean?
Stranger: r u male or female
You: neither.
You: i’m a lamp.
You: lamps don’t have genders.
You: last time i checked.
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

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Still bored? Check out these sites.

Yeah, more blatant self/cross-promo stuff.

Just launched: http://www.hotchicksoncars.com – obviously need some submitters there :)

Oldschool: http://www.thingsjkeats.com – have some stuff coming down the pipe, but plenty of old goodness to kill some time with.

Almost dead: http://www.wrongaddy.com – It was fun while it lasted (read: while I was getting erroneous emails)

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World Domination!

You: hi
Stranger: Hey.
You: Say something witty! :D
Stranger: my wit is not free.
You: :(
You: how much?
Stranger: you cannot handle the wit.
Stranger: its like a mike tyson punch to the brain.
You: I totally can >:D
You: Oh…crap
You: maybe I can’t….
You: hmmm
You: Well this is awkward.
Stranger: lol.
Stranger: You…
You: What should we speak of now”? xD
Stranger: say something stupid.
You: OH That IS my FORTE good sir
You: Ducks can’t fly.
Stranger: I would have also accepted “Dog’s can’t look up”
You: Really?
You: Why not?
Stranger: Yeah.
Stranger: its the way their spines are formed.
Stranger: anyway… they have no aerial predators.
You: Holy crap you have got to be kidding me.
You: I cant believe I was living my life not knowing this.
You: T_T
Stranger: venture forth, citizen!
Stranger: glory in your new knowledge.
You: :D I shall spread it to the world!
Stranger: wallow in it like a pig… a thought pig.
You: Much like herpes
You: xD
Stranger: yes… I should probably tell you that knowledge does come with occasional cold sores.
You: Oh fudge D:
You: hmm…
You: well you do know how to cure a cold sore don’t you?
Stranger: flamethrower?
You: :D Amazing! It’s like you’re psychic!
Stranger: I am.
Stranger: I’m controlling everything you do.
You: :0
Stranger: I’m a mad puppeteer.
You: for reals?
Stranger: I’m just on Omegle cause i’m bored.
Stranger: yeah…
You: I KNEW there was some reason I bought that ugly shirt today
Stranger: controling everything a person does is quite tedius.
Stranger: tedious.
You: :( WHen you control me could you plz give me some fashion sense?
Stranger: Ok. You have sort of looked like an autistic 9 year old recently.
Stranger: I mean… Gold Lamee… really?
You: :D
You: But… i liked my shiny sweatpants :(
Stranger: No more.
Stranger: from now on I will groom you into becoming the worlds FINEST SUPERVILLAN!!!
You: :D oh goodie!
Stranger: sharpen your rapier wit, my friend…
Stranger: we’re going hunting!
You: :)
You: for knowledge?
Stranger: First step… see that baby.
Stranger: STEAL ITS CANDY!
You: that ugly one with barf on its face?
Stranger: FOR EVIL!
You: But… what if it barfed on the candy?
You: :(
Stranger: the candy is not for you to eat.
Stranger: it is for you to steal.
Stranger: to deprive the innocent of luxury.
You: OH! Okay that makes sense..
Stranger: Everyone in the world is like that baby.
Stranger: uncoordinated…
Stranger: ignorant…
You: :0
Stranger: and weak.
You: Oh my.
You: Except you right master?
Stranger: TAKE what you want.
Stranger: oh, no… especially me…
Stranger: I’m locked in this wheelchair.
Stranger: On a prison planet.
You: D:
You: I shall break you out!
Stranger: I was like you once…
Stranger: I was naive and free.
Stranger: but I hesitated.
Stranger: I showed them mercy.
Stranger: NEVER AGAIN!
You: So mercy is bad?
Stranger: I will train you to crush them, with your steely fists.
You: yay :)
Stranger: only use mercy to get what you want…
You: what do I want?
Stranger: to crush the spirit.
You: >:)
Stranger: kittens… all the kittens in the world.
Stranger: you will implant them with robotic eyes…
Stranger: and LASERS!
Stranger: Phase one.
Stranger: they will laugh at you , oh YES!
Stranger: but you will laugh last.
You: Ah! And what will the kittens be used for?
Stranger: PHASE TWO you imbecile!
You: Sorry T_T
You: er.. what was phase 2 again?
Stranger: a complicated financial stratagem involving cocoa futures and certain derivatives of which you are unworthy of knowing.
You: Oh my :0
You: I think my small brain is about to esplode
Stranger: Phase 3?
Stranger: You will build a time machine.
Stranger: Using the cybernetic kittens to battle the Time rats, you will travel back and sabotage certain crops with a genetically engineeered SUPERmold.
You: :0
You: oh….
You: This plan makes perfect sense!
You: I must go prepare, master.
You: Be lurking on Omeglechats.com for this :)
You: I’m going to title it “World Domination!”
You have disconnected.

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blow fish

You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Stranger: r u up for oral sex
You: yes, but only cause im a blow fish.
Stranger: kk im takin off my clothes rite no
Stranger: now
You: go for it
Stranger: r u ?
You: …..no
You: fishes dont wear clothes
You: silly
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

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Have you met Brian

You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Official messages from Omegle will not be sent with the label ‘Stranger:’. Strangers claiming to represent Omegle are lying.
You: HI
Stranger: bonerrrsssss
You: MY NAME IS BRIAN
You: I LIKE TO SKATEBOARD
You: MAYBE WE CAN BE FRIENDS
Stranger: MY NAME IS ALEX
Stranger: MAYBE WE CAN
You: I’D NEVER DO ANYTHING TO RUIN OUR FRIENDSHIP
You: LIKE POOP MY PANTS
Stranger: GOOD
You: HEY
Stranger: INEED ONE OF THOSE
Stranger: LOL
You: I HEARD THE LAST GUY YOU TALKED TO POOPED HIS PANTS
You: OH WHAT AND IDIOT
Stranger: HE DID!
You: HAVE YOU MET BRIAN
You: HE SEEMS PRETTY COOL
Stranger: HE DOES
Stranger: IM DIGGING HIM
You: HE LIKES TO SKATEBOARD
Stranger: THATS SWEET
You: YOU WON’T FIND ANY POOP IN HIS PANTS
Stranger: THATS WONDERFUL
Stranger: POOP IS BAD
Stranger: WELL IN THE PANTS
You: Pssst….
Stranger: lol yeah
You: I THINK BRIAN POOPED HIS PANTS
Stranger: NOOOO!
Stranger: BRIAANNN!>?
You have disconnected.

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Jorts

Stranger: ask me anything
You: what do u do if a walrus eats your pants?
Stranger: use jorts instead
You: i see
You: well ummm do u got any jorts?

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Insomnia

You’re now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Official messages from Omegle will not be sent with the label ‘Stranger:’. Strangers claiming to represent Omegle are lying.
Stranger: Hi
Stranger: How’s it going?
You: alright you?
Stranger: I’m okay, exhausted.
You: why?
Stranger: Didn’t sleep much last night
You: why not?
Stranger: Insomnia
You: oh that sucks
Stranger: Yes, it does.
Stranger: So, what do you do?
You: i sleep
Your conversational partner has disconnected.

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