You: if I was in your room right now what would you do
Stranger: Shoot you.
You: what if you didn’t have a gun?
Stranger: Stab you.
You: what if you had no arms or legs?
Stranger: Bite you.
You: that’s hot
Stranger: Why are you invading my house, anyway?
You: i heard you have mudkipz
Stranger: I see. I lack those.
You: do you have candy?
Stranger: I have brandy.
You: close enough,i’ll let you bite me and i’ll tie your torso to the bed and drink all your brandy
Stranger: Alright, sounds like a date.
You: 9 months later i’ll have your half-body child
Stranger: Wait, it’s genetic now?
You: you have to pay child support in mudkipz
Stranger: Why would I have those? I have no job. Who hires cripples?
You: you can be a sex slave in China
You: or even Mexico
Stranger: That’s always an option.
Stranger: Except who sleeps with cripples?
You: well i did evidently
Stranger: Yes, but your a diagnosed psychopath.
Stranger: You did it for the perverse sexual thrill.
You: AND THE MUDKIPZ
Stranger: Yes, that’s another one of your delusions.
You: it’s your fault
You: you love my disorder more than me!
Stranger: Well, it is a rather sexy disorder.
Stranger: Your urge to kill is my aphrodisiac.
You: you’re the one who wanted to shoot me
Stranger: Yes, but you were in my home.
You: they’ll lock us both up only i get a padded room!
Stranger: Padded room? Hah! Maybe in your lala land. The crazies get locked up all the same!
Stranger: Ever since that man the tried to kill reagan got off on a crazy plea.
You: YOURE JUST JEALOUS ILL GET ALL THE MUDKIPZ WHILE YOUR ANUS IS SAGGING ON THE FLOOR FROM RAPE!
Stranger: That’s a rather disturbing mental image.
You: youre welcome
Stranger: Would my anus be like an elephant’s trunk?
You: yes except you can’t eat with it
You: …or can you
Stranger: I can pick up things with it.
You: thats hot
Stranger: You certainly get hot rather easily.
You: nah just horny
Stranger: Hire a hooker.
You: they don’t make them cripple size
Stranger: Oh, they make them any size.
You: you would know
Stranger: They’ll cripple ‘em for ya?
You have disconnected.
for the mudkipz
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