People’s Republic of Canada


You: m or f?
Stranger: guesssss
You: or
Stranger: or?
You: or what?
Stranger: idk u just said or
You: that was my guess
Stranger: oh werong
You: shame
Stranger: yeahh
You: maybe you could have an op? get both parts?
Stranger: im male!!
You: how surprising
Stranger: mhm
You: i guess that you are in texas
Stranger: nope
You: shame
You: could you move there?
Stranger: maybee why should i?
You: good schools
Stranger: ohh got fine ones here too
You: I guess so
You: not AS good though
Stranger: yess. im doing collage already
You: what is it of?
Stranger: machinist
You: why would you make a collage of machinists?
You: is it a tribute?
Stranger: noo
Stranger: im in collage
Stranger: idk how to frickwn spell it
You: so you made a collage of yourself?
You: that’s a bit vain
Stranger: noo like school
You: a collage of your school? is it like a leaving present for the principal?
Stranger: noooooo im going to colleage
You: which one?
Stranger: conestoga
You: in Canada, eh?
Stranger: yeah ontario
You: what’s that all aboot
Stranger: whats what all about?
You: why do you need to make a collage of a place in Canada?
Stranger: im not making anythingggg!! lol im taking my machinists liscence
You: so you’re a machinist, but you can’t make anything?
Stranger: i live in ontario and im going to conestoga colleage
You: how do you get the license then?
Stranger: i doo
You: you do what?
Stranger: im doin a 3 year course
You: without making anything?
You: how does that work?
Stranger: i make sattilite parts
Stranger: i work for comdev
You: so you do make things!
Stranger: its just a bunch of schooling and stuff
Stranger: yesss
Stranger: i work every day
You: so why do they need you to make collage of satellite parts? do they sell them to the Soviets?
Stranger: im not making a collage of satellite parts. i work for a company that builds satellites and sends them into space
Stranger: i make the parts
You: for the Russians?
Stranger: nooo
You: I think one of my uncles is a Russian spy
Stranger: for canadians
You: it’s either Uncle Ted or Uncle Vladimir
You: I think it’s Ted
Stranger: lol cool
You: so are you a full on communist?
You: or do they just pay well?
Stranger: what the heck nooo.
Stranger: i dont work for russions
You: oh right
You: Canada’s Soviet though, right?
Stranger: u dont get it
You: The People’s Republic of Canada
Stranger: it has nothing to do with war fare
You: no, I get that
You: but it’s like space travel
You: like the cosmonauts in the sixties
Stranger: yeah kinda
Stranger: i dont even know what they use them for
You: the Soviets were really into that back then, I guess you guys are getting back into it now?
Stranger: i just make the parts
You: so you don’t ever wonder where they go?
Stranger: all i know is that they go into space
You: so do you ever get inspectors in?
Stranger: yep
You: I guess that’s a part of Glastnost right, trying to open up your parliament to other parties
Stranger: dont work for the government or any parties
You: oh
You: so you’re like a freelance?
Stranger: i have no idea i just work for a small company that makes the parts for the company that builds the satelittes
You: I guess that don’t want you to know too much
Stranger: i could know anything i wanted to if i did want to
You: is it hard living in such an oppressive country? I read somewhere that the internet is censored in Canada
Stranger: i juat dont care
Stranger: what??

Stranger: your weird
You: sorry
You: just concerned is all
Stranger: mm ok?
You: aren’t you afraid of what the state police do over there?
Stranger: they dont do anything
You: don’t they report on it?
You: it’s all over the news here
You: on the spot executions of dissidents
Stranger: report what??
You: all parties are banned except the communist party
You: that’s what I heard
Stranger: we dont have that here
You: wow
You: you seriously don’t know?
Stranger: what? this is canada we dont have that here
Stranger: have to ever been to canada??
You: have you heard of the Montreal Massacre in 1994?
Stranger: not really
You: :O
You: Canadian agents massacred a group of aid workers trying to bring aid to West Canada
Stranger: oh
Stranger: idk i dont get involved in politics
You: you should, man
You: people are dying in your country because of the communists
Stranger: why? what difference does it make?
You: don’t you ever wonder why they never report on certain things in your press?
Stranger: there are nooo communists here!!!
You: that’s what they tell you
You: because they want you to think that
Stranger: do u know anything about canada????
Stranger: whatever
You: but Canada’s been communist since the end of the second world war
Stranger: noo it hasnt
You: we studied it in history
Stranger: its a free country
You: if it’s free
You: then how come you can only vote for communists?
You: how come you’ve never heard of all the atrocities committed by your government?
Stranger: we can vote for however we want!!
You: a vote between two communists doesn’t count
Stranger: there are no communists here to vote for
You: okay, who do you vote for then?
Stranger: i dont vote
Stranger: but some of my friends do
You: who do they vote for?
Stranger: idk whoever they feel like
You: yeah
You: ask them
You: I bet they voted for communists
You: perhaps without even realising
Stranger: i know my sis voted for the dude thats in now harper
You: Chairman Harper?
You: He’s ex-KGB you know
Stranger: steven harper
Stranger: whatever
Stranger: send me a pic of u
You: they say he was personally chosen to lead the PRC by Brezhnev
Stranger: idk what that is
You: It’s where you live, the People’s Republic of Canada!
Stranger: ohh cool
You: you didn’t know it was called that :S?
Stranger: nope
You: jesus
Stranger: what do u think about obama??
You: they told us in history that most Canadians aren’t aware of it
Stranger: hes retarded
You: but wow…
Stranger: oyh
You: you would say that
You: you only hate Obama because he’s not a communist
Stranger: yep and u would say all this shit about canada
You: the truth is not shit!
Stranger: noo because hes not even an american
Stranger: he wasnt born in the states
You: Neither is Stephen Harper
You: he was born in Moscow
Stranger: ohh cool
Stranger: obama is muslim
You: no, he’s a real American
You: not a commie
Stranger: nope hes muslim
Stranger: noo hes not
You: that’s just what the propaganda tells you to say
You: I bet you believe everything you read
Stranger: no they dont
You: suuure
You: you don’t understand your own national history
You: so you mock the USA
Stranger: ppl think hes god or somethin
Stranger: noo only the president
You: we just like that we live in a free country
You: with elections
Stranger: so do it
You: we did it
Stranger: I*
You: suuure
You: “free” elections between communist officials
You: you’re a satellite state of the USSR, everybody knows it
You: (except, apparently, the Canadian public)
Stranger: yeahh u obviously have never been here or know shit about canada
You: I’ve been to West Canada
Stranger: whatever
You: but not the PRC
Stranger: why do u even bother to learn all this shit
You: I had to
You: for history class
Stranger: oh well none of it was true
You: you should learn your own history
Stranger: come here and find out for yourself
You: you could put that in your collage
Stranger: im not making a collage!!!!!
You: American tourists are forbidden to visit the PRC, there’s a state of emergency
Stranger: haha bullshit
You: it’s true!
You: some US journalists were shot in Winnipeg the other week for violating it
Stranger: noo its not my cousins from florida come up here all the time
You: he TELLS you he’s from Florida
You: but I bet he’s really coming in from the Ukraine
Stranger: ive been to his house
You: on a plane?
Stranger: your retarded i was in florida a couple weeks ago
Stranger: and noo i drove down with him
Stranger: he drove up
You: sure
You: and I bet he didn’t render you unconscious with psychotropic drugs
You: to make you think you remembered a drive
Stranger: what the hell he slept all the way

You: when in fact you were most likely bundled in a cargo plane
You: and woke up in the Ukraine
You: it’s well documented
You: there’s a whole city in Ukraine mocked up to look like Florida
Stranger: and it was 100 ferinheit with aplm tress
Stranger: I dont thinks so
You: they pay close attention to detail
Stranger: yout full of shit
You: the truth shall set you free!
Stranger: then find out the truth
You: I know the truth
You: but you, you can’t handle the truth!
You have disconnected.

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